Tuesday, April 13, 2010

Little Step - Saying 'No' or 'Help'

I have this habit of saying 'yes' and 'no' at all the wrong times. I say 'yes' to commitments that I am not really sure I want to do, and 'no' to doing fun things with the kids.

I have a meeting this morning, of the Mother's Union church group. I love this group - they are supportive, encouraging and committed to charity work that helps mums and families. But, once agan, my habit of agreeing to things too quickly has me stretched thin. I have to tell the meeting this morning that I simply can't do one of the major commitments that I took on. I think I will have to ask for help, or that a committee be formed, to make sure that the job gets done.

Is it something to do with being a Stay at Home Mum? Do I feel that I SHOULD have the time to take on commitments, because I am not working outside the home? I don't know, but I do know that I feel far more at peace when I am able to comfortably fit my commitments into my family life - rather than being overwhelmed by things I have agreed to do.

So today's challenge for me, and all of us, is to consider your commitments.... are you over-stretched? Do you feel obliged to carry out things you have agreed to (or things people just expect you to do), without saying 'no', or asking for help?

Ask for help, with one thing today. It doesn't have to be a big thing - just ask the kids to help set the table, or for someone to help with the washing up, folding clothes, or whatever. Or you can set about really de-cluttering your life, and politely say 'no' to a commitment that is hanging over your head.... like I have to.
You get a point for each time you ask someone for help, or politely decline something that you don't want to do, or don't feel that you can fully commit to.


  1. Oh I completely agree Sasha! I say Yes far to quickly without realising what I'm getting myself into... gotta take a stand and just say 'sorry I don't have time at the moment'.

  2. I agree too! I have only just been thinking about this. I am really bad at saying no and I rarely ask for help. This has really made me think. Thanks and good luck!

  3. No is a good thing. I'm 'no-ing' all the time. I've already learnt that in life.

  4. Normally I try very hard to get all the daytime dishes done and dinner on its way before my husband gets home from work... just to try and make the later evening a little smoother. But yesterday I was so tired, and when Pippin finally went to sleep for half an hour at 5 pm I thought 'bugger this, I'm going to have a cup of tea and something to eat and read a book' and say NO to dishes for now... it was just lovely... :)


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